For those of you who read my blog this is a semi sequel to "Why dogs will always be better than cats..." For the first time readers out there, I pet sit for one of my best friends, Whitney. She has 2 dogs and a cat that is intent on eating me alive. Whitney usually leaves me a key in a specific area... this time I went to the house the area had been completely removed from the house itself... hence my confusion and slight panic. I was already running late and I MAY have panicked slightly.
Whitney has a house that luckily for me and the dogs has a doggy door. As I walked into the backyard hoping that her neighbors weren't thinking I was robbing the house, I hoped beyond hope that the doggy door had not been locked. This was after I moved every potted plant in the yard looking for a key. Let me tell you, that girl has a lot of potted plants and doormats. It was a robbers nightmare, but lucky for me I wasn't a thief...even though I undoubtedly looked like one.
What did I do next you might be thinking? I committed my first B&E. That's breaking and entering. For the police officers reading this... my friend would've wanted it this way...and she found it amusing. Yes. I did crawl through the doggy door. Yes I was scared half to death as I climbed in and got slightly stuck after coming face to face with the cat who whacked me in the face with its tail then immediately tried to eat my hair. So there I was, on all fours, half stuck in a doggy door, getting my hair eaten by a murderous cat, and my butt getting jumped on and licked by 2 overly excited dogs.
Guess who was told where the key was ahead of time but neglected to read the entire message? This girl. The lesson here folks is always read the entire message unless you want to be locked out of a house when the key is sitting 10 feet away to your unknowing self and have to climb in through a doggy door. Or don't and have an awkward and mildly entertaining story to tell. However, the only thing I regret is not having a really good picture of me climbing through the door...
I realized 2 things. 1 I am crafty and if all else fails I have an absolutely horrible future of crime ahead of me. Just kidding. 2. I feel like most people would resort to something less drastic and weird. 3. because number 1 wasn't real.... I'm proud of myself for going to the gym so much because it would've been awkward to wake up to my friend wondering why I was sleeping on her deck with the dogs.
So I finally got inside and all seemed normal. I was unpacking my bag to get my shower stuff when out of nowhere the cat decides it wants to eat my shirt. Here's picture proof:
My morning was on the same level of WTF. Cicadas had come out in DROVES that night and were buzzing around in the morning like they were preparing for battle. When I was walking the dogs I was constantly bombarded. I called my Dad and what does he tell me? "Put some in a bag and bring them back for me. I want to put them in the freezer." My response? "....................you're kidding right?" But I knew better. My Dad has been putting bugs in the freezer ever since I can remember because he likes preserving "cool" ones. We even had dead birds in our freezer at one point. I remember one of my friends coming over and opening the freezer for ice and screamed because a frozen bird was staring her in the face. That's my life ladies and gentlemen.
There I was in the backyard of Whitney's house holding a stick and a ziplock bag trying to coax grumpy cicadas into a bag. I'm sure they knew they were going to a cold death, but they only were going to live another 24 hours ish... If the neighbors hadn't worried about my sanity the night before I'm sure they were making sure their children went no where near me or Whitney's house until I was completely gone.
Anyone else have a weekend to top that on the scale of weird and unfortunate? Didn't think so.
"The greatest pleasure in life is doing what people say you cannot do."--Unknown
